I choose to honor my authentic self by responding with love.
Welcome to the 19th episode of Giving Back Insights, my Thursday solo show where I talk about how our guests and their charities serve others, to explore actions each of can take to make a difference in people’s lives and to share. Today I’m talking about love and kindness. Listen to today’s episode and don’t forget to give your feedback and valuable comment. Enjoy!
I met Leslie from Code Tenderloin for breakfast last week. What a great person, what incredible work she, the team and the participants are doing at Code Tenderloin.
I don’t remember exactly how we came to talk about our respective futures, but I do remember the funny, almost puzzled look on her face when I told her that I am still finding my path. In the kindest voice, Leslie told me this, “Rob, I haven’t known you very long, but there are 3 things that I think of when I’m with you. You’re deeply spiritual, you’re steeped in love, and you’re a storyteller.”
That sounded just wonderful to me. After many years of working on ME, working on being the best Rob possible, to be recognized as someone “steeped in love” — wow. After being around all these amazing, generous people, learning from them, sharing their lessons, making a difference to others, I’d finally figured it out.
You know, the Universe has a funny way of recognizing when you need a reminder that life is about the journey, not the destination.
When I was with my son Carson in Santa Barbara, I got upset with him over directions, and blew a great opportunity to help him better navigate anywhere. When I pulled back and calmly explained how I’d process the moment to redouble my efforts to be patient, I thought I was pretty smart. Sure, I’d made a mistake. I’m human, and I know how to handle it and get back in my loving groove. Leslie’s keen observation of me proved that I was right, right?
Not so fast. The day after meeting Leslie, I react with anger and insecurity to my wife instead of responding with love and genuine curiosity. Luckily, she’s kind enough to recognize that I’m struggling, and stays calm.
Remember what I said about the Universe giving me exactly what I need and want as long as I’m open to receiving it with an open heart? And that sometimes what gets served up for us can be uncomfortable, or downright unpleasant? Those two moments reminded me of what I’ve been struggling against for so many years, what has caused me great heartache, held me back, kept me from connecting deeply. My greatest weakness is arrogance. Ouch, and thank you for the reminder to be ever vigilant.
I’m gonna tell you what my arrogance has caused. I’ve blown deals worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. I lost an executive position. I dismissed people, have a very small network of professional contacts from previous jobs.
Gratitude solves this, it’s a reminder that despite myself, I have so much.
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. — Victor Frankl
This is my daily affirmation: starting now, I choose to honor my authentic self by responding with love.
When I go to my Creator, I’m happy to be judged based on one guiding principle: I erred on the side of love and kindness
I shared three important life lessons with Carson as he embarks on his collegiate journey, Do Your Best, Surround Yourself With Greatness, and Purposefully Align Your Behavior to Reflect Your Good Intentions & Be Open to the Outcomes. I have two important additions to the lessons I shared with Carson. The first is to pause. When I’m feeling angry, upset, jealous, pissed off, annoyed, insecure, or any other negative emotion that comes from an event or a person’s behavior………just pause. Then choose to respond in a way that reflects the best person I am.
The second is easy: Don’t be stingy with your love. Err on the side of love and kindness.
Love & Gratitude